FAQ — Casa Pacis
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Bloopers
You may ask why we go through such an effort of compiling this detailed question and answer (“Q&A”) list. After all, what could there be so special to this small house? You own your own house and know how to use home appliances and electronic equipment and whatever else is in there! Sure, you do -- but read what other renters actually did:
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— Safe Use of Fireplace: Our housekeepers discovered several inch-size burn holes burnt all the way through the area rug into the carpeting below, in front of the hearth of our conventional open fireplace. Renter: "Oh, a log fell off the grate, but nothing much happened ... ". Indeed, several logs stacked on the grate can generate a roaring fire that can easily get out of control. Luckily the guests had not yet gone to sleep when the burning woodpile crumbled, and the house did not burn down ... (Unfortunately, this experience has triggered our precautionary decision to ONLY permit burning of wax fire logs (one at a time) in the fireplace of Casa Pacis — no more burning of wrapping paper or even firewood).
— Cooking with an empty pot: what happens if you place a pot with a bit of water on the range, perhaps to steam your vegetables, turn on the cooking plate -- and then "quickly" go outside "just for a couple of minutes"? You guessed it: you forget, the water will evaporate, and the bottom of the pot will then get so hot that it melts, and the molten solder will drip onto the stove-top, and ... and ... "But no," the guest responsible for this disaster (that luckily stayed localized on top of the range and did not burn down the house) insisted, "the pot was inadequate!" Well, our least expensive remedy was to get a new range top installed.
— Walking through screen doors: When you are on the deck, at night, it can easily happen that you don't see that the screen door is closed, and you walk back inside right through it ... Of course, that's the end of that screen! "But no, the screen was old and fragile!" or, "it was already broken when we arrived!" (New screen doors set us back $350 .. each).
— Washing & drying laundry takes time! If you start with washing your laundry just an hour before your departure time, of course it won't get done! Guest: "the dryer is no good, and so we couldn't leave on time!" Or, another renter outright: "It was impossible for us to do the laundry! Yet, even worse, another renter folded the linens when they were still wet ... (We only request guests to launder only those items that they used from our personal supplies beyond the rental allotment, which is one set of towels per person and the bedding guests find on arrival).
— Purpose of dishwasher: Every guest will probably agree with us that the primary purpose of a dishwasher is sanitation. To this effect, we — and they — rinse the dishes at home before placing them into the dishwasher. This will keep the drains not plugging up and the dishwasher well functioning. For some reason, when it comes to a dishwasher in a vacation home, it seems that people have a different understanding … and clearing the drains, and collecting broken glass pieces from the bottom of the dishwasher becomes a necessary nuisance/repair more often than appreciated … but it surely is not our preferred past-time when we return to Casa Pacis.
— Excessive dishwasher detergent: A guest notified us, "The dishwasher is leaking!" Indeed, every dishwasher will do that if too much detergent is used. (The excessive foam will create an over-pressure inside the dishwasher, and foamy water will be pressed past the door seal and drip onto the floor. A teaspoon of detergent is plenty for one load. "Less is more!"
— The Toaster Battle: A toaster is one of the least expensive kitchen appliances. The cost to replace one is somewhere in the noise level, but the hassle related to replacing it is annoying nonetheless. Expensive or cheap, a toaster will last for decades - if treated properly, that is. We typically have to replace them every year. Why? It’s that good old fork! I don’t know why people ignore the wooden “tweezers” we provide to remove a toasted something from the depth of that “appliance” - they keep using a fork and a knife and get entangled with the heater wire, which will of course break immediately - and that is the end of the service life of that toaster. We usually buy two or three toasters at a time, but to replace them in the moment when guests notice that previous guests ruined the heating wire is still an annoying experience …
— Scratch-resistant frying pans: after going through dozens of frying pans we have tossed away over the years for excessive knife cutting marks, we can categorically state that a knife is no friend of a non-stick frying pan, no matter what the manufacturer promises. A law of physics states that what’s harder will scratch what’s softer. It goes for any non-stick frying pan: a knife is harder than the non-stick surface … Why not use the soft spatulas that we provide?
— Common sense! Renter: "The water cooker does not work any more!" "Did you plug it in?" "Oh, I plugged it into another outlet, and there it works!" "Perhaps you touched and tripped a GFI, which can happen easily!" "Oh, that was it ..." (this was the contents of multiple e-mail exchanges ...). (For everybody’s safety, we use GFIs in most electrical circuits)
— Plugged toilet: I have never understood why people throw items in the toilet of a rental home that they would never ever put into their own toilet at home ... "But it's not our fault!" we hear. (We once had to call a plumber, who had to take the entire toilet in the Casa Pacis MBA off its seat ... only to find that a golf pencil had lodged itself such that no plunger could unclog it ...).
— Raccoons! Renter: "Raccoons came into the kitchen and took remnants from our turkey!" Yes, they are abundant everywhere at Sea Ranch and so clever that they will work en famille and push the screen door to the side to get inside (and only, but surely, poke a hole in the screen if that screen door is locked). Therefore, keep your food items out of sight during the night and be alert when the glass door is open -- do not count on the screen door to keep out a hungry raccoon.
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All of these things can happen. To everybody! We all make mistakes. That's understandable. But what is a lot harder to understand is when the guests committing these bloopers would not live up to their mistakes and leave the problem for the housekeepers or next renters to discover - or blame us, or the materials or our facilities that they happened, in hope or expectation of getting their full security deposit returned ...
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While there is perhaps still an element of humor in the above mishaps, we did not find any humor in the one below:
— Not recognizing the charge on a credit card statement is something that occasionally happens to all of us. Usually a minute of reflection or a friendly phone call to the number given on the statement will startle our memory. After all, the vast majority of such unrecognized charges turn out to be legitimate. But one renting guest immediately cried foul with PayPal for "false charges" and also canceled that charge with her credit card company. It took just one day for PayPal to determine that the charge was legitimate, but their hands were tied until finally, eight months and over 20 e-mail exchanges later, the renter could finally be motivated to get back to American Express to unfreeze the legitimate charge ... … (It is this experience which led us to no longer accept payment by credit card, in favor of Zelle or an “old-fashioned” personal check).
Thank you for your understanding! We take the mere fact that you have read this page as an indication that you will treat our home with care, and we will be happy to accommodate your repeat patronage. To that effect, we will give you an extra five percent discount on your repeat rental fee when you request it and cite this "bloopers" page offer.
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